Talking about a colleague behind their back is socially common but culturally toxic. Max Levchin's rule at Affirm: 'Do not allow us and them dynamics.' The fix is simple and hard.
Alpha Score of 58 reflects moderate overall profile with moderate momentum, moderate value, weak quality, moderate sentiment.
On any team, there are three ways to express disagreement with a colleague. None of them involve talking to someone else first.
John is frustrated with Dan. He should not take that frustration to Tom, Dick, or Harry – unless one of them is Dan's manager. The trap is obvious once you name it. People still fall into it constantly.
Commiseration is a natural form of social bonding. Two teammates share a moment: "Isn't it annoying when Dan calls without warning and rambles about his project list?" That sentence is a small cultural fire. Left burning, it collapses the team.
Max Levchin, writing about building a meritocracy at Affirm, put it simply: "Do not allow 'us and them' dynamics to foment anywhere at Affirm." That's the whole rule. When a company stops being one team with one mission and becomes a collection of sub-coalitions, in-groups and out-groups, it dies by a thousand private conversations. Rumors build. Trust erodes. Resentment compounds. Performance follows the same curve.
The alternatives are short and hard: disagree productively, directly, with the person who made the decision. Or keep it to yourself. "Don't talk about colleagues behind their backs" belongs on the same shortlist as any formal corporate value.
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