David's First Week of Kindergarten and What It Taught Me About Trust

David started kindergarten this week. After three years in an inclusive PreK program, I spent weeks wrestling with questions. Would a full day be too much? Would he be safe and loved the way he had been in PreK? Would he be made fun of? Would he get the one-on-one attention he needs? Would a full day just be too long and too tiring?

We met with his whole team and his new kindergarten team together. I walked in skeptical. I walked out blown away by how carefully they listened and how thoughtfully they addressed every concern. We built a plan together. They were over-the-top accommodating so David could be in a traditional classroom with all the extra supports he would need.

The first day came. David cannot communicate verbally, so I watch for cues. One of those is eating: he only lets people he knows, trusts, and feels completely safe with feed him. It usually takes days or weeks to build that trust. His aide told me he ate two full pudding cups on day one. I said, "What?" I had expected him to refuse food for the first few days in protest of a new environment. The fact that he ate like a champ told me everything I needed to know.

On the second day, his teacher read a book about Down syndrome and inclusion to help his classmates get to know David and learn how to be a better friend to him. I cannot express how deeply touched we are by the way our boy is being loved and championed at his school.

Kierstyn has library assignments from school now, so we have a weekly library date. I am teaching her how to search for books on the computer. She loves reading and learning, and it is fun to watch her.

The last two Saturdays, I volunteered at the state fair with Kathrynne, who was staffing the booth for her boss. It was so fun.

I interviewed Ruth Chou Simons and Susie Larson for upcoming podcasts this week. "The more you learn to live into the most total, most genuine sense of who you are in Christ Jesus, the more miraculous your life will be," Larson said. I am eagerly anticipating those episodes.

I remember that first year of marriage when we struggled with infertility. Doctors had no answers. I remember the ten years of secondary infertility after our first three kids. And now I look at our full, chaotic life with six kids and think: this is a gift. The challenges, the laundry, the dishes, the needs, the tiredness – all of it. It is a testament to answered prayer.

Looking around at a full plate, a full schedule, a full house, full arms, a full sink of dishes, a full laundry basket – it all bears witness to the faithfulness of God.

I have found that assuming the best in others has been a catalyst for incredible change in my relationships. Instead of making up a story or projecting onto a situation, I try to give someone the benefit of the doubt rather than jumping immediately to being hurt or offended.

A friend does not reach out during a hard season? Maybe they do not know you are struggling. Maybe they are going through something themselves. Maybe they want to help feel awkward. You can also reach out and be honest: "I am struggling and would love to see you."

A friend acts standoffish at an event? Maybe they had a headache. Maybe they just got unsettling news. Try leaning in: "I saw you last night and missed talking to you. How are you?"